just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Randomize
