You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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