We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
