Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
