You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
