that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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