omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
operation have a gay friend backfired
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
