Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
