uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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