HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Randomize
