we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
In other news, I just burned my penis
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
