I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
