i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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