We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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