Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
