he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
