me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize