So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
