I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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