you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
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