he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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