did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize