it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
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