Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize