Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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