if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize