butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
