Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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