so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
