I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Randomize