I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
