I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize