Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Randomize