he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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