Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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