I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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