So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I came so hard my ears popped.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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