I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
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If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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