he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
