I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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