My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
