you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
