The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
