In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Randomize
