I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
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