If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Randomize
