im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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