So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
