Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Why is your signature on my underwear?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
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