My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
