so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize