my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he fucked my hip out of place.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
you had me at cake vodka
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
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